


Efficiency

by MaskedShipper



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Blow Jobs, Carlos in the Desert Otherworld, Carlos misses Cecil, Dry Humping, Dubious Consent, Frottage, Kevin tries to be helpful, M/M, Mentioned Cecil/Carlos - Freeform, One-Sided Kevin/Carlos - Freeform, One-Sided Relationship, Oral Sex, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Scientist Carlos (Welcome to Night Vale), Sleepy Sex, The Desert Otherworld, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love, sleepy carlos, slight somnophilia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-27
Updated: 2018-08-27
Packaged: 2019-07-03 03:02:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15809985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaskedShipper/pseuds/MaskedShipper
Summary: “Cecil isn’t here,” Kevin offered helpfully.Reallyhelpful, voice straining with how helpful he was being. “A long-distance relationship is unproductive. Cecil isn’t here to discuss plans with you or get food with you or stay up late talking with you. But I am. And I lookjustlike him, don’t I?”orCarlos misses Cecil while in the Desert Otherworld, and Kevin takes it upon himself to make Carlos a productive member of society again despite that.





	Efficiency

“Hello, Listeners! You’ll never _believe_ what day it is! Yes, it’s Work It Out Day, which means get those calloused hands digging into some desert dirt and increase this new town’s productivity – how could anyone forget? I _did_ announce it at the last town hall meeting. Today is _also_ the day that marks mine and Carlos’ three month anniversary! My, how time _flies_ when there’s no concrete way to measure it. But then, what _is_ time anyway? Even if we _could_ measure it, what, exactly, are we trapping and confining to measure in the first place? Oh – Listeners, our existential questions will have to wait. We have a visitor!” 

Kevin could recognise that rustling anywhere. He kept all the doors of the studio open just to catch it as soon as possible – sounds of a fashionable yet practical lab coat fluttering gently in a way that matched the rhythm of a brisk pace set by comfortable shoes.

“Carlos!” he exclaimed, smile bright – dare he say, the _brightest?_ – as his favourite handsome scientist weaved his way through the soon-to-be kitchenette and almost-fully-built research area right outside the sound booth. 

“Oh, hi, Kevin,” came his favourite handsome voice. “Did you get the tower running yet? You seem to be in the middle of a show – do we have working radios? I didn’t think my prototype was functional. I keep getting side-tracked with how sound seems so infinite and unlimited here in this otherworld – but I’ll get to it soon, I promise.” 

And Kevin just could _not_ stop smiling. This was a good day! Had Carlos come all the way to his meager, humble, still depressingly undecorated radio station just to spend their three month anniversary with him? “Just because we don’t have radio waves doesn’t mean I’m not a radio host, Carlos. Did a lack of working lab equipment stop you from doing science?” 

There was a very scientific hum at those words, a tilt of his head so that gorgeously lush hair fell briefly in front of Carlos’ eyes. It was getting so long; they really were going to have to do something about that. Get a nice trim. It would do _wonders_ for that beautiful face. 

“I suppose not,” Carlos replied, smiling wry and uncertain in that way he did sometimes. It faded for a moment, but that was alright, because Kevin was smiling twice as much for the both of them. Efficiency was important, after all, and this new community was built around the idea of teamwork and synergism and _teamwork_. If Carlos let his smile fall, Kevin would happily take that extra work. “Actually, Kevin, I’ve come to discuss something rather important with you.” 

Oh, here it was! Three month milestone time: Carlos was finally going to acknowledge that they were together! “Yes?” Kevin drawled, unable to keep his voice from increasing in pitch. “What kind of important matters of the heart are you here to discuss with me, Carlos?” 

The scientist shifted his weight, looking a little uneasy, before meeting the radio host’s eyes with a strange determination. “It seems you’ve been telling some of the people here that we’ve… been on dates?” 

“Thirty-seven, to be exact,” Kevin offered helpfully. It didn’t help Carlos smile any brighter, or… at all. He felt his cheeks ache with the work it took to grin enough for the both of them. 

“Kevin, we… we _haven’t_ been on dates.” 

The smile slipped, but only for a moment. Kevin was a professional, after all. 

“We’ve gotten food together, yes, and… we’ve discussed plans for this place, and for my new labs, and for the new shops, and for this new radio station, yes, but we haven’t… that wasn’t romantic. That was friendly. I _like_ working with you, but we need to be clear about boundaries. I’m dating Cecil. You know I am.” 

“Cecil isn’t here,” Kevin offered. Helpfully. _Really_ helpful, voice straining with how helpful he was being. “A long-distance relationship is unproductive. Cecil isn’t here to discuss plans with you or get food with you or stay up late talking with you. But I am. And I look _just_ like him, don’t I?” 

There was a hesitation, Carlos looking him up and down in a very scientific, non-flirty way, those dark brows furrowing together. “Yes,” he finally said. “You do. But you’re _not_ him, Kevin. And emotional matters don’t need to be productive to be valid.” Kevin parted his lips to reply, but no words came out, so he shut it again, feeling strangely incomplete. “I just wanted that to be clear between us. Is… is it clear? Because I’ve brought along some diagrams and charts to help explain, if you think that might help.” 

And while they sat together and Kevin nodded politely when appropriate, he lost focus on what was being said and channeled his energy in memorising the lilt and sway of Carlos’ perfect voice.

#

It was date sixty-two when Kevin started to realise that maybe Carlos had been serious when he’d said that these weren’t dates at all. The radio host found professionalism and business-talk as sexy as the next guy, but through it all, Carlos hadn’t reached for physical contact even once. Not one moment of lingering lips to his cheek, no gentle hand squeezing the air from his throat, no affectionate pat on the shoulder – _nothing_. And really, it was starting to take a toll on him.

Not on Kevin, of course, because he had long since mastered the ability to be professional in all situations. No, Carlos was getting edgy, watching wistfully as members of the masked warrior army found solace in the company of their partners, staring longingly at his phone without moments of babbling about this theory or that anomaly. It made it hard for Kevin to smile, because Carlos was, in fact, the _most_ productive person in this new town. His ideas brought to fruition new buildings and new machines and new technology that they could all benefit from. And each day away from Cecil made him impossibly more inefficient at that work. 

But Kevin was not unkind. He knew the guilt and hardships and fear and _guilt_ that came with being an unworking and distracted member of society. They were friends, if not lovers – Carlos had told him that, hadn’t he? And, as a very handsome scientist’s friend, Kevin took it upon himself to take that distraction away for him. 

There were many opportunities to help Carlos out. It seemed that scientists slept anywhere from five to eight hours a day – how entirely wasteful! It was a good thing Carlos had so many different projects going on, or else Kevin wasn’t sure how he could forgive him for that. But, as it was, it allowed for a lot of time to be helpful. 

Kevin made his way to Carlos’ place in the dead of night and gently, so very patiently, and only after running his hands appreciatively over the soft lab coat he slept in, pulled down the boxer briefs the scientist wore to bed. Yes, Carlos must have been overwhelmed with physical loneliness and no doubt too busy during the day to take matters into his own hands, because his (very flattering) cock certainly responded positively to that. Who was a humble radio host to deny a scientist’s body what it wanted? 

“Hello!” he whispered to the dark, pulsing, newly freed dick from his spot kneeling by Carlos’ bed. He was nothing if not polite, after all. “Don’t you worry, Friend! I’ll take care of this.” Carlos’ thickness had twitched in anticipation, but was still far too soft to be anywhere near efficient. That was alright. It was one of Kevin’s talents to push people to their full potential. 

He wondered if his hands were as soft as Cecil’s, if he touched Carlos the same way his double did. So reverent. So careful. He gave those curled, coarse hairs a gentle pat before palming the scientist’s growing erection, wondering if it was hardening because his hand was so familiar, or because it wasn’t familiar at all. He leaned forward and breathed in the musk of science, eyes flicking up to a soft, sleeping face before Kevin gave a tentative lick. There was an appreciative moan, a hand coming to his hair, but Carlos didn’t pull, like Kevin might have liked, only hummed a name that sounded an awful lot like _Cecil_ and which Kevin promptly ignored, because he did _not_ need that kind of negativity while he was working, thank you. 

Kevin climbed onto the bed, pausing when he was properly settled between Carlos’ legs, looking up at a face framed by strange, otherworldly moonlight, to the smatter of grey at his temples, to the throat constricting due to the night air and hot breath against an aching cock. It was truly odd that a man could be so beautiful without being covered in blood. This must be what love felt like. Oh, how distracting! Kevin used this revelation to force him to work harder. With broad swipes of tongue, he mapped the pulsing flesh Carlos offered him, dragging his lips against a thick vein only to swallow the cock whole so his mouth felt complete with its fullness. 

“ _Cecil_ ,” came a harsh whisper, but the hum of disapproval certainly seemed to put Carlos in his place, because soon there were calloused, soft hands on his face, curling through his hair, still not pulling or forcing Kevin this way or that, but hey, they were there, and Kevin was grateful. Carlos’ involvement certainly inspired him. He sucked, hollowing his cheeks and fucking his mouth against Carlos’ cock maybe a tad more forceful than he should have for their first time, but really, could anyone blame him? His lips stretched painfully, his mouth aching, but he gagged himself on Carlos’ thickness with moans of his own, slow but forceful in the way he swallowed it down so he could nuzzle coarse hairs as he drooled. Kevin could have stayed like that until morning, nose pressed so hard against Carlos’ pubes that he couldn’t pull air into his lungs, dizzy with a lack of oxygen; when he looked up, trying to see if Carlos was appreciating all this hard work, his vision blurred perfectly, the edges of his sight going dark, tunneled. 

Oh, how nice it would be to stay like this, choking peacefully, except brown, worried eyes finally opened and Carlos was _finally_ forceful with him, gentle but firm as he pushed Kevin’s mouth off his dick with a very satisfying pop, a slurp following as Kevin tried to suck his spit back up, aching for the taste of Carlos in his mouth. “Sweetness, that can’t be pleasant,” he said, voice thick as honey, sleep still clinging to him. Kevin just hummed in reply before burying his face back against the scientist’s crotch, jaw aching with its desire to be full, mouthing desperately at Carlos’ hardness as if that might make him change his mind, tongue desperate for that heaviness to settle atop it once more. “Honey – _nng_ , Sweetness, let me – ” That beautiful voice trailed off, but the force in his hands were gone; Kevin let himself be guided higher up, pouting at the lack of cock in his mouth, at the lack of being coerced into whatever position Carlos wanted. He parted his lips, ready to politely disagree with this turn of events, except, now that he was higher up, Carlos pressed a leg between his own and _oh_ , okay, yes, this would do nicely. 

Carlos grinded up against his thigh, and Kevin, well, there was no need to work so hard to smile _now_ , not when he had fingers on either side of Carlos’ head, clutching at sheets, so very close to hair he could pull _just_ right if only he wasn’t so focused on thrusting against the leg against his own clothed, aching cock, each breath a hum of delight or choked moan and oh, if Carlos turned his head just slightly, Kevin could _bite_ him, and - 

“Cecil,” Carlos moaned, quiet and desperate, mouth parted and head thrown back as those perfect, delightfully experienced hands slipped under Kevin’s shirt, beneath the waistband of his leggings, everywhere at once, and oh, something this gentle, this innocent, had never been so _nice_ , and Kevin whined, desperate, brows furrowed together as he fucked himself against Carlos’ leg, hands squeezing his ass and pulling him closer and this was love, it _was_ , it had to be – 

And Carlos kissed him then, just the slightest pressure on Kevin’s lips, and oh, _Sweet Spire_ , Kevin came undone entirely inefficiently, tensing and crying out and clinging to Carlos like he might float away if he didn’t, scratching at his shoulders, his neck, leaving marks on his chest with the force of it, spilling himself in his pants and entirely breathless. 

It took him a moment to come back to himself, to remember that this was for Carlos, not himself, so with an affectionate pat to the spot on Carlos’ chest that now had marks from how tightly Kevin had gripped him, the radio host shifted so he could straddle those very lovely hips and, slowly, purposefully, dragged his still-clothed ass against that still beautifully hard cock poking at him. 

But Carlos had gone silent, tense, and really, Kevin understood. He’d been out of place to think he could bring himself to completion, especially before Carlos had even found release, but really, it wasn’t his fault! Carlos had kissed him with those sweet, perfect lips, and – 

Oh. Kevin knew just how to make this right again!

The whole of him felt like jelly, his body lax and limp and ready to curl against his _definitely-more-than-just-friend-Carlos_ , but that would be unfair. Immoral, even! Kevin rocked back against Carlos’ cock, moaning as he did, wishing he’d thought to take his pants off so he could feel Carlos’ very heartbeat with each pulse of his dick. And as he worked him like that, grinding against him with energy that came only from a _very_ productive work ethic, he leaned forward and kissed him. It was hardly as gentle as Carlos’ kiss had been, and instead of just a slight pressure, Kevin dragged his lips against his again and again, moaning his delight against a hesitant mouth until those pretty lips parted and Kevin could finally get a proper taste of him again. He suckled at Carlos’ tongue and, it seemed, was forgiven for his past mistake, because Carlos let out a harsh breath through his nose and those hands came back to hips – when had those silly things wandered off? – and moaned against his mouth, bucking up. 

“Not… Cecil…” Carlos moaned against Kevin’s lips, and the latter mistook that moan as one of pleasure, not guilt, because really, guilt had no place in the bedroom. He mistook those hands trying to push him off as an eagerness for speed, as Carlos finally realising he should be forceful, and Kevin was forceful right back, nipping his approval on Carlos’ lips as he pulled away for air, sighing and groaning happily as he grinded against Carlos’ perfect dick. 

Kevin was panting and groaning and hardening again as he tried to fuck himself through the clothing, desperate for Carlos to surround him, consume him, fill him up. The quiet, sure movements he’d started the night with were gone, replaced by wild thrusting and frantic moans pulled from his lungs. He panted Carlos’ name against sweaty skin, mouthed his affections against his chest and neck and jaw and left a trail of open-mouthed kisses behind them, lips parted in an eager hope to be filled and weighed down with anything, absolutely anything, that was connected to Carlos. 

“Oh _please_ ,” Kevin begged, wanting so much for Carlos to cum, proof that he’d been good for him, proof that he was enough, proof that they could do this again and again until both of them were sated and Carlos was _happy_ and _oh_ those hands were rougher now, those hips snapping up to meet Kevin’s thrusts, and it was good, _so_ good – 

It looked awfully painful, which was likely a sign that this was long overdue, when Carlos finally arched and pulled Kevin’s body against his, keeping his ass against his cock, and spilled himself against his pants. He went limp when it was over, falling back onto the bed, hands covering his face as he murmured apologies under his breath to people who weren’t even in the room, leaving the radio host to happily fall to his side beside him. 

One moment passed, then another, then a series of infinite singularities, enough that Kevin caught his breath and Carlos became quiet against him. “Well,” he said, when it became clear that the scientist wasn’t going to speak first. “I think… that was a very successful tryst, don’t you, Carlos?” He wished he could feel cum against his thighs, against his skin, leaking down against him, but that would have to wait for the next time Kevin was helpful. For now, he was happy to curl against a warm, scientific body, breathing in happily. 

Carlos did not move for a very long time. So long, in fact, that Kevin decided to pretend to sleep, ever polite and knowledgeable about sexual etiquette. Eventually, the scientist pulled himself away and moved out of bed, shuffling to a desk in the room, and turning on the lamp. 

There, the scientist began writing a letter, and, knowing how happy he’d made him tonight, Kevin hoped it was a letter of thanks addressed to one very efficient radio host.


End file.
